i met a boy and i'm in lovvvvveeeeeeee and we're going to vegas and getting marrrrrriiiieeeeedddddd!
let's be honest with each other here, that's about the worst idea you've ever had. you need to walk this one off.
You drank the expired grape juice because you were convinced it had fermented into wine...you have a problem.
he said "cool" when i took off my bra and proceeded to stare wideeyed at them the ENTIRE time. it was like sleeping with the kid i showed my boobs to for the first time in 6th grade.
I'm pretty sure I saw a man standing on a table with no shirt on getting sugar thrown at him while "pour some sugar on me" blaring while the cops were in the house.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm sitting the next couple hours out. Puking in a potted plant really put shit into perspective for me.
you started introducing us as kentucky and gentlemen
Convinced the domino's pizza delivery person to go to shaws and buy me a bottle of wild turkey. For america.
You said that about some fat chick sitting on the base of a lamp post and puking. Downright heroic.
Once again being low on toilet paper is forcing us into another round of our favorite game - toilet paper roulette - where there can only be 1 winner. Maybe.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think my teeth are moving, they feel like people.
Omg my orgasm just made the fucking sun come out. Clearly my libido controls the weather now.
I don't want to spend an inordinate amount of time with you, I want to have sex with you. Duhhhhhh.
My vagina is the only part of me that is pleased you lived through last night.
Bahahaha I just turned on the fan in front of the elliptical to avoid puking//try to get some baywatch hair going and the guy next to me thanked me because he was "getting nauseas from the smell of stale sweat and tequila"
It’s the universal cock block of this decade
FUCK THE COCKBLOCK 19
Randomize