We're facebook friends in real life
Why did we buy the only spinning apartment on campus?
So after THIS dui, I've decided to stop driving. Not drinking, just quit driving.
apparently vodka and oj turns green when you throw it up
basic color theory
Reason #3 women are better than men: texting and peeing simultaneously. Write THAT in the fucking snow.
you said you couldnt let go of the fence because your hand was molding to it.
you were crying while pretty ricky was playing, what did you want me to do
I think my multiple attempts of taking his life, no matter how unintentional they were, has put a damper on our friendship
Apparently he crashed because 3 different girls were trying to give him road head at the same time.
Think of all the island guys I could have. Ah well.
You can not bait me into a "how Stella got her groove back" call and response.
Thinking of someone think of me while masturbating while I masturbate. & that's how the over thinkers do it ✌ï¸
Note to self don't stop having sex during an earthquake! I call it a 6.1 orgasm!
Wait, but now I'm curious. In what position were y'all when the cops came? Were you guys butt ass naked in the car? 😂😂
you know my pussy doesn't know between good and evil
These business classes have improved my drug business ten fold
Randomize
