Today at work while talking to my co-worker we both realized at the same time that last year I had a one night stand with his roommate and he was in the living room drinking coffee when I did the walk of shame. YAY.
True story: Just left my solo cup on a cop car. Yesss
do you know how hard it is to sit through a 3 hour movie with someone and not fuck them?
..and then spiked the maple syrup at iHop
She looked like a pterodactyl.....but dude i love dinosaurs
Worst PDA I've ever seen. She even licked the mustard off his mustach
lets grab drinks (in a friendly, not super awkward because ive eaten your ass kind of way) sometime soon
wow.
You high fived me for banging your sister but lock me outta house bc I ate your pumpkin pie? Priorities bro
Her face is stuck to the frozen jager bottle. I think shes ok with it
Just had a tv talk show interview in my mirror. Got into to some pretty heavy shit man, would have made good viewing.
She just got on the scale. frowned, got off and took off her pants and then got back on
I'm sure there are thousands getting dick today in the name of independence
There they were doing the deed on the beach, looked like two seagulls fighting over a chicken bone.
Sorry, I gave half my brain to my thesis and the other half to mdma
Came home to butt plugs and dildos in the bathroom sink WTF
Spring cleaning
Randomize
