Did your girl go home? Did she have fun? Can we have our friend back?
dunno bout you, but i grow tired of beef curtains
Note: fake nails and fingering anus.... Not a good idea
Is it a step in the wrong direction to ask my parents for a kegerator for graduation?
Security said no more parties of this kind. To me that translates to Theme party this weekend.
cashier rang me up and said, "white people are funny." like i'm NOT the only white person to buy just lettuce & 40 glow sticks
You were definitely doing something right. You could only see the colored parts of his eyes a couple of times. I was pretty sure he was dead at some point.
I just wanna be like "dude your gf's on a porn site" but i just dont know if i have the heart.
How do I know if porn I have watched is haunted?
I decided to let him keep the rest of my good weed as an "I'm sorry for being a drunk ass ho" consolation prize.
He put chocks of wood in front of his doors to stop me from leaving. I'm not nearly drunk enough for that to be appropriate behaviour.
How many fucks given?
0.12846
he threw his shirt and suit jacket out the window of the uber going home
The reason why I poison my organs is so that you guys can't sell them.
You're swimming in an imaginary pool of pudding. What do you think?
Randomize
