so i'm sitting in his room drinking tequila from the bottle and watching harry potter. he's jacking off to some porn a couple feet away from me. at one point i look over and see that he's watching me instead of the porn. please help me figure out how warped it is that i found that romantic
Eating in charleston sc at a seafood place called "hymans". Like normal I had no problem finding it.
Yeah, I probably scared him away when I drunkenly told him we'd have beautiful children
I feel like i could break down a fucking wall with this boner
Soooo, coming over soon?
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Who knows? Maybe we can sing afternoon delight into each other's genitals.
let's make a party pact right now just as precaution for this trip: ill make sure you don't piss yourself if you make sure I don't bang my cousins friends. deal?
I kinda wanna Instagram the giant vag stain on my sheets. That is something to be proud of. It's a Christmas miracle.
You throw up behind 1 mannequin and it's world war 3 in forever 21
I just lifted up my shirt to scratch my stomach n a Dorito flew out of my pullover n it legit scared me when it hit me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So what did you do since you didn't go out?
...ate chocolate and watched bring it on....it's like I don't even know what it would look like to be straight.
I'm starting to think that Cosmic Steve ripped me off
For a guy who came before his dick was out of his pants, he gave surprisingly good head.
None of these texts make sense. except for "step 2.5 equals velociraptor." that i get.
Seriously if we go to rome ur fucking me into the sunset on a wrought iron balcony overlooking Vatican City
Apparently I drunkenly told him I was going to ride him to the rodeo and break him like a bronco, then I stole his nachos and beer. Adulting is hard!!!
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