i just google searched 'can you pop your ovary'
also, you're talking to the girl for whom "deformed baby arm" wasn't quite a dealbreaker.
just got my girl scout cookies. wanna get high?
I found your pet lobster in the bathroom this morning. I went to return it to you but it escaped.
I mean nobody wants to admit they ate 9 cans of ravioli but i did and i am not ashamed of myself
I think I'm still a little drunk from Sunday Funday and I just changed for a date in my car. wish me luck.
Both our collective sex appeal dies once someone cums on a snuggie kayla
I received a text promising me sex if I drove to Memphis this weekend. Too bad for my penis that we're watching zombie movies and playing cards.
what compelled you to fill her bra with pudding and freeze it in the first place?
i might remember if i didn't get knocked out with it later that day.
In order to save time, dignity and liver damage, wanna get naked?
Painting strippers breast and vaginas to look like easter eggs. What r u doing tonight.
I'm going to make you a sign to put on your penis to ward others off
She rode me wearing nothing but a Santa hat. Merriest fucking Christmas!
If you wake up with half a an eyebrow.... I'm pretty sure it was a good time.
I got a message the other day that just said “great tits”
A gentleman AND a scholar
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