Im already sauced. Have been for hours. Its kinda my thing.
just printed 333 ways to get kicked out of wal-mart. hello thursday night.
walkin around the woods blazed, drawing pictures of trees and plants, i get a grade for this
What's a "vodkaffle"?
It's where she puts vodka in the waffle mix.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
A 300 lb dude in a sundress yelling bible verses while wearing a raggedy anne wig is just as funny as I thought it would be. Thank you san francisco.
I do. There's a bald headed guy whose kinda hot. I might rub his head. I've only had 2 beers
Im pretty sure you told the waiter at Dennys last night to take your pants off or show a nipple.
Just woke up from a dream where you lived in a gingerbread house on a snowy cliff by the sea. The dolphins were swimming away from a giant dust storm. You REALLY ought to smoke this before bed tonight.
allie, at least he made an effort and braided his goatee.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So....I just took a paddle fan on high speed to the side of the head while getting head...still finished the job, good thing I'm drunk and couldn't feel it.
You yelled "Everybody!!! Round of applause to Jill for not doing anal!!" Right in front of him.
never planned on seeing last weekend's one night stand again, much less be on the same plane as him..
Watching the series finale of Friends and crying in my Thai food. I don't like hangover Jared.
Look, if this is a cop, just lemme know that Mike is ok. Fuckin all star game
You microwaved all of my silverware, I don't care if you spent all your money on tequila, you're paying for this.
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