You know you have a problem when you walk into your bathroom find kettle one in your shower and a note you wrote yourself when drunk that says "panties at jared leto's" on your counter
i have more money on itunes than i do in my bank account... college.
Would you like to blur the lines between friendship and lesbianism tonight?
I jerked him off and then punched him in the face for no reason. Typical evening drinking Sailor Jerry's.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I woke up to a gnawing sound in the middle of the night and asked him what it was. He told me it was the family of squirrels that lives in the wall and to go back to sleep.
Im not coming back to that place until im drunk. If I walk in there sober Ill start screaming uncontrollably. Not words, just sounds.
Is it malicious or apart of the healing process if I wipe my ass with his toothbrush?
I suggest absurd amounts of masturbation this weekend to build up the necessary calluses
THIS IS A TERRIBLE REWARD FOR NOT GETTING PREGNANT.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I am sorry. I am also on acid.
As planned I took it to the limit. Then we met a new limit. Now they are limit friends.
The cop said he like my hair today. Please explain all other interactions with law enforcement, k thanks
I'm surprised this is your first encounter with pepper spray. surprised, and somewhat proud.
I just bumped into this random I hooked up with a few years ago at Steve's party. Talk about a fingerblast from the past!
I called him the wrong name all night, yet I still got a ride home from the party and hooked up with the guy. I'm irresistible.
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