Fyi I let myself into your place, I'm wearing some of your clothes in your bed. Come take them off
we got sick of 7 11 doubles so we made up a game where you just drink when anyone rolls a 5
thats barely a game just flip a coin
should we drink on heads or tails?
after everytime she pucked, she insisted on us all giving her high fives
i just watched a special on porn, the business isn't doing so good. You may want to wait before you start your career
She was giving me a handjob while I was wearing a sombrero with a beer in one hand and a hammer in the other.
All I learned from that experience was that drinking scotch out of a crunk goblet was bad news.
he walked out as i was licking snow off of his car...
i'm not entirely sure that 'not getting kicked out of the bar until it got dark' really classifies as 'doing better'
Peeling duct tape off of my dick is definitely one of the stranger sensations that I've experienced.
If it makes you feel any better... I have a friend who found out her mom was in the video for 2 Live Crew's "Pop That Pussy"
she stole my Timberlands and my Sublime shirt and left her heels and bra. this is war
Clearly I'm trying to change the world one fuck at a time
you DO IT for the people
I invited him to my hotel room via snapchat. I'm one hell of a classy bitch
I'll explain later but I just had to legally commit to abstinence for the next 4 months
I wonder if the sex shop has any Black Friday deals.
Randomize
