Ever have a poop and think... that has no business coming out of a human? Like it looks like a sick dog's or a ferral animal's?
If we went to a costume party as Batman and Robin I would go as Robin, that's how much you mean to me
I don't know how it happened, one minute we were talking about Huck Finn, the next minute I was blowing him behind the corner of his apartment building.
the bar tender told me i could keep an air matress in the backroom.
She said I walked up to the McDonalds counter and ordered just a cup full of pickles then proceeded to offer some to everyone in the place.
I literally just wrote "I'm sorry" in my blue book, got up and walked out
dude to be honest with you there is a used condom that ive just left on my floor for three days
you have got to get your shit together
The strip clubs here are like a safari of penis, and I'm gonna bag me a rhino.
His mom walking in on us having sex was probably the highlight of the night
I know him enough to fuck him but not enough to give him advice.
I'm so glad I can be everyone's guide to the world of fucked up kinks
Two of the boys I banged while living in that house are about to move into it hahhaaha
I told him I lived in the apartment beside his brother and he said "oh, you're the girl that watches really loud porn!"
He can sense you did cocaine and had park sex with a large ginger from Australia last night.
So he apologized for peeing on my floor.. then we fucked all night.
Real classy
Randomize
