My moms helping me unpack but im getting a little nervous because I dont remember where i put my dildo
you won't ask to borrow his earbuds because you think it's gross, but you'll have sex with him?
Hmm. I hear gunshots, car horns blaring, hear drunk white people screaming, and see about fifty status updates pertaining to the hawks. I guess they won.
DON'T LET IAN EAT HIS PEANUT BUTTER!!!
Just remembered that I poured a whole bottle of tylenol in there. It's chunky. It's deadly.
I think it may of been me pulling down my pants is why she walked away.
When you get home there will be live fish in the bathtub. I did not put live fish in the bathtub.
Woke up with your brother in my bed...where do you want me to return him?
Clearly it doesn't get better with age. Just more sexual
Direct quote from her that tipped me off I was getting some: "I want to jump on his shoulders and wrap my legs around his face"
He just whispered "doors are weird" and then laughed so hard he fell down the stairs.
Because nothing screams stable like yelling at a guy in a bar because last time you hooked up he stole your underwear.
Ask him to get me chedder bratwurst instead of the molly
Unless if you guys already left. Then I want the molly
I'll have sex with you for tacos. I don't care, man.
Shia just rubbed his beard the way I do all the time and maybe he's my soul sister. This live stream is life changing.
He kept telling me my vagina was a pleasure cave... I ended up just taking it as a complimetn
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