he told me that if i wanted to smoke he could make a piece out of my shoe. were keeking this kid around
All four of us managed to throw up in the same bathroom at different times during the night. I think we'll get along great living together.
there was a 40 knocked over. chips and salsa all over the floor. and she was in her thong doing boot camp on demand in the middle of the room..
while we were having sex she stopped and said, "god is always watching". Then she started again with no other words said. We were fucked up.
my tonsil wound opened up during the kegstand but i stopped it with a popsicle
I've decided I'm peeing in a solo cup then throwing it on his windshield. It's official. He called the cops 4 times in our first week at the house. He deserves it, right?
I NEVER left your party last night of anyone asks.
Yeah, I didn't wake up handcuffed to my bed either.
I swear my vagina formed calluses just to deal with how big he is
Well who could blame her. I would run away from me if I could.
Do you think he feels stupid trying to bang girls with his small penis? I'd be embarrassed.
I just want to be able to run around naked and eat grass with no judgments and have people feed me and expect me to sleep all the time.
I'm sorry for drunkenly throwing a spoon at you and then laughing at your pain.
I made a booty call at 3:30 am on a Monday... I think I just became the ultimate female fuckboy. I don't know whether to be ashamed or get myself a trophy.
Look, you're talking to the wrong girl here. Tacos>dick always and forever
On a scale of 1 to alcoholic in withdrawal how ready will you be to start drinking as soon as you arrive on campus?
Randomize
