Hey man sorry I got all grabby
are u sure the monkey wasnt drunk too
Terrible. Enormous nipples with a small ring of boob on the outside. It looked like a tittie eclipse
He's like the fucking Houdini of bras. Not only did I not feel him take it off I didn't find it until two days later.
long story short: there's a file in the master file cabinet labeled "lube".
Im going home to examine my vagina with a hand mirror. wish me luck.
I'm also 95% sure I had a conversation with someone on how hard it would be to jerk off with out opposable thumbs
He made me cum 4 times, we high fived afterwards and then I proceeded to tell him about this guy I'm dating whilst I made him a bacon sandwich. I think we've finally mastered being friends with benefits.
Lets just say that a certain piercing set off certain alarms when I went thru the airport detector/scanner thingie. David was high fived like 12 times.
I LOVE YOU NO MATTER HOW MANY BALLS YOUVE SUCKED
Thank you contacting dial-a-boner. Currently, our boner is on a run to service another client. You can either wait 2 hours for service, or share concurrent service with the current client.
I blew him while the canoe was sinking...I think of it as the better version of the titanic
What if for Halloween I paint my self gold and make sandwiches for everyone? I'd be a trophy wife! Get it?
Yeah,I'm just gonna keep fucking other guys til this idiot figures out he loves me.
Donald Trump looks like someone photoshopped hair onto a dick pic.
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