i had a headache and asked the kid next to me for aspirin. he gave me esctacy instead. gotta love college.
I got a lot accomplished today, and the day is still young! I built a fort, hot boxed a fort, had a tea party in a fort, and now realizing how high I am.
i think the doormans mad at me
well we haven't pretended to pretend we were going to have a threesome with him for a while...
i will be the first lesbian to ever fail women's studies.
And some old guy told me Jesus loves me and I laughed super hard and told him sinning is fun. Hahaha
Please please please buy brown eye liner on your way home in the morning... I'm missing an eyebrow
Na Im fine, just need to un-grow this vagina I've developed
The sound of my own breathing is making my head throb. That hungover.
Told the cab driver to take me to narnia last night. Turns out there's a bar called narnia on the south side of town. We are in business
Got robbed by an ATM. My weekend officially sucks.
No actually you're a pro. You puked on the cab ride, and managed to completely contain it in your purse. the cabbie was even impressed.
u better not lose ur virginity to a sugar daddy who doesn’t post a pic of himself to tinder
The shower rod just came down while I was pooping. I caught it though and the curtain stayed on, so I'm not sure if it's a good or bad omen for the rest of my day
Spotify says I’m in the top 1% of Indigo Girls fans worldwide. Didn’t know I would peak this early.
Aren’t you trying to seem...less lesbian?
Why do so many fanfic writers want to see hockey players get pregnant?
Randomize