did it hurt when the cum got in your eye
not so much hurt, more like a stinging sinsation like mouthwash
Did you draw a mustache on my drivers license picture??
currently walking past a fire hyrdrant with a hose already attatched.. this could be dangerous..
he came and i only had my diet coke to rinse.. can you say coke float?
We were making out in the bushes when some dude comes and starts peeing beside us.
Apparently the library doesn't care about celebrating the day Jesus became a zombie.
She came to the party with six kegs and a life sized portrait of Lavar Burton. SHE WILL BE MY WIFE.
You should make it a point to use vocabulary that is competition appropriate around him, like "champion" and "training" and "victory sex"
There's something very strange about masturbating in a hotel room. I feel like I'm cheating on my room...
Whiskey dick has taught us to be smart with our time.
I'm a professor! I can't be caught chasing the liquor with you hooligans once the undergrads have seen my face
that's the second time I've made out with him and woken up with my pants stuffed with PBRs I am convinced he's magic
Oh, in response to your "does dating get better" question...I feel like penises are getting smaller nowadays. Its been several years since I saw a good 8+ incher.
It feels so wrong having a picture of my tits next to a picture of my daughter.
Go shave, and then go fuck the man
YOU ARE SO CRUDE, I LOVE YOU
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