i don't have parental supervision. i'm gonna start accepting candy from strangers now.
to be honest..when i was little i used to think sharks can swim out of drains and eat people
Just showed mom and dad the pics from San Francisco, while i played the Full House theme song in the background.
Just took a celebratory "i havent slept with anyone in this bar" shot. yesssss....
and my loofah got caught on my nipple ring in the shower today. what an awful experience.
I have pictures of you scratching against the sliding glass door on your knees screaming how you felt like a lamb.
I say go for the trifecta and maybe you'll get a medal or something. Or a baby. That's like the same thing right?
I HAVE A GENTLEMANLY VAGINA.
I just ran into the woods like an idiot because ADVENTURE.
Have you ever just like not slept in so long that everything looks like a lava lamp?
Also, my old intern Lizzie whom you fed pizza to last night wants to hang out with you
People like you and me aren't meant to go this long without having sex
He lives 20 minutes away driving distance and decided to walk. I talked to him today and he took a nap along the way... In a cemetery.
Fuck I think I want to but I don't think I should. Caught between should and wanting.
just follow your vagina
Quote of the day.
Places I vomited today: hotel bathroom, in the cab to the airport, airport bathroom, airport terminal trashcan, plane seat 18E, and the plans bathroom
Fun wedding?
Yes. Very.
Randomize
