$1.99 mimosas n bloodys til 3. Happy hour starts at 4. We're gonna ride the mechanical bull to kill the hour inbetween.
Please take video.
I'm just gonna go nail your roommate after we break up anyway.
We played strip Bananagrams and I won. Thank fuck I read a lot as a child.
My brain is foggy with friends reruns and him licking hummus off my tits.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
your ex girlfriend just barged in my house, drunk, mumbled something about "car strip", and put a huge hole in my drywall with her head.
I think we should get high on adderall and nair each other again for New years.
On another note, why did I wake up wrapped in bubble wrap. I can only assume it was for my own safety
Liquid roulette time! Black Mystery Cups are filled with either ipecac, whiskey, or NyQuil. Let's have fun
I was talking about you wanting my dick, but that works too
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I started blowing him in North Dakota, and I finished the job in Minnesota. Oh, the places road head can take you.
I am going to tweet NASA until they put me into space
Those rocketship riding assholes need the common man
You started crawling towards a moving train. Maybe you should take it easy next time
Anyone who has court these next few days keep your head up & smile knowing we broke the County Record with 27 underage consumptions
I lost my bra, he lost his virginity. Seems like a fair trade off.
It's very finicky. Like baking. or BDSM.
Randomize