Potential corruption. He's 19.
Get them while they're young!
Are we in a gay sports bar?
That's what happens when you let Keystone Light make your decisions.
Dude stop singing. Your life is not an episode of fucking glee
last thing I heard her say before I passed out was 'this is great. I never get to be the big spoon.'
Just told my mom sparks is a health drink. Officially getting hammered on the way to the beach.
Also, I imagined that his bacne was bubblewrap and that made it much more tolerable
I saw a guy do a line this morning in line to start the 5k, happy thanksgiving!
I got to walk around for eight hours wearing power armor and acting camp. No way I wouldn't love it.
Hey, you can never be fully sure you're straight until you jerk off to gay porn
That sad moment when the drawer I used to keep condoms in now has poptarts in it..
I need to learn how to not be a fucking liability
I keep worrying the police are going to come looking for us.
For which one? Starting a fire on my porch or having sex on my porch?
I JUST WANT TO SIT IN MY UNDERWEAR AND WATCH THE BRAVES GAME AND NOT BE CONSTRAINED BY MY ED SHEERAN SHORTS
no dude he sent me cemetery flowers, i know it. they are half dried out roses in the shape of a cross, seriously. and he is not religious. so he robbed a freaking grave site for me. am i like an accessory to grave robbing now??
damnit this is what you get for dating guys with neck tattoos
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