This kristen chick is fuckin nuts. She's pyscho. She's a trainwreck. She carries baggage. She's... Perfect.
Did you fuck her?
If by "fuck her" you mean "threw up on her shoes," then yes, I achieved that.
i just had a dream that i could control how black Will Smith was with a remote.i need to stop sleeping with the TV on
Bts the comment you were making during that picture was "look we have penises"
Whenever ur ready we need breakfast and a psychic.
I just hope this isn't happening Final Destination style
Travis Barker would totally be Devon Sawa in this scenario
it was all downhill after the free blackjack taco
There's a skateboard on the patio and all the chips are gone. The note on the fridge says 'don't buy cheese'. Stop letting her go outside.
Mass texted booty calls to all the guys I've hooked up with this year to commemorate the end of the semester.
Woke up shivering behind the titty bar, With the worst leg cramps. I'm like a poster boy for responsibility.
Dude, i don't know. I don't remember anything after we started chanting/playing "shot of gin."
He is peeing inside and sticking up for himself. Those are two of the four signs of the apocalypse.
Cool. Some 22 year old kids gave me a ride home from the bar last night. In related news, I made out with a 22yr old last night. He was adorable
i knew it was love when she pulled a beer out from between her boobs and offered it to me
I think the cashier at 7/11 might be planning an intervention for me.
Randomize
