FYI: Do not ever call any girl a thundercunt as a form of dirty talk.
So I got a little fucked up on the punch, and made out with the family friend. Which is apparently morally reprehensible. I don't get that.
You better be watching. There will be a POP quiz. Each correct answer gains you 5 more minutes of the sexual act of your choice
Wow that was a lesbian tornado.
I feel like I've been drunk all of June. And I am in NO WAY ashamed about it.
the boys love us. they call us "the stoner girl suite down the hall". not very inspired, but flattering nonetheless
you crashed our wine night double date and sat on the floor eating cheese talking about how big his dick is.
I just found a video of you asking to be a whale with me.
He had a tramp stamp of his own phone number. You can't tell me that isn't smart.
NoShamevember. You game?
Woke up eating a pickle on the bathroom floor this morning in some random guys sweat pants.
I was masterbating to some porn on my phone and my mom decides to text me "are you okay?" I mean i was doing great until you cock blocked me mom..
I remember reading the word "lift" so I did. The alarn went off, and I thought to myself "what dumbass pulls the fucking fire alarm?" and then I realized it was me...
All three of the bartenders here have screwed my boss, so he's definitely gay. Unfortunately for you he seems to have a type and you're not it.
For a second fuck I think last night went extremely well... our sexual relationship is progressing at a pace that im quite satisfied with.
Randomize
