his logic is that since hes already cheated on her w me its doesnt count
some girl that im facebook friends with has H1N1, im scared to even go to her facebook page
Why do I feel like I used to feel when I almost got caught looking at porn when I get caught looking at facebook at work
I'm guessing "whatever I can get" wasn't the reply the nurse wanted when asking what med I need. Oh, and asked for a cartoon band-aid.
So does it count as really great road-head if he ran over 3 mailboxes before realizing he was off the road?
I feel as though I could trust her, I mean she did tell me she was married before we had sex.
THEY HAVE VIAGRA FLAVORED GELATO
Why does my jaw hurt?
I may have punched you.
Dude. Going to the Theme park the day after the 4th of July was the worst idea I've ever had.
I tried to take home a cat on broadway last night. I named him Pinocchio and put my purse down on the sidewalk and tried to put it inside it
Banana suit guy has an entourage and they're all douchebags. There is no god.
10/10 would definitely still fuck you dressed as squirrel
Today was brought to you by the letter B for beer and bourbon and the number fuck you I'm meant to be studying not hungover
Sometimes I refuse to go through a door until someone holds it open for me because I'm a fucking lady.
I just ate broccoli before drinking. Does that make me a responsible adult?
Randomize
