if you dont talk to me in person you cant text me
there is a ziplock bag over sangria in a wineglass in the fridge...classy?
If I was on drugs, this would be amazing
he accidentally used the toothbrush i use to induce my bulemia...i feel like this is something he shouldnt find out...
Dude, just paid my sister in vicodin to go out and buy me a slushie.
ARE YOU ALIVE? usually when i say lets start drinking at inappropriate times you come right over. im worried
I've been here 20 minutes and some creepy old man told me he wanted to know what my insides felt like. I hate gay bars.
I need a second opinion on who's blood is in my car.
I smell like Captain Morgan and tears
I think if it were a part of everyone's daily routine, the world would be happier. International Finger Yourself While Bathing Day.
Man i fell asleep on a random persons porch on the way home and woke up to the family banging on the windows trying to wake me up
On the bright side, only one more day until we aren't sober anymore.
Drunk me commented on almost all of her pictures. My favorite one is titled "be as the sea". My comment is "cold, rough, large and letting anyone come inside you. you accomplished." Guessing I'm not invited to the party anymore.
He told me he loved me...but added "you crazy bitch" at the end. Does it still count???
I'd give my right arm to start my period. My right arm. Thats more significant then my left.
Randomize
