I basing my decision on whether or not to date someone on whether I could imagine having sex with them sober
my 12 year old sister just told me how admirable it was that i felt comfortable going out with my friends dressed "like that"
you went up to him and asked if you could have "friend sex." He looked like a 7 year old on christmas morning
i just drank the rest of the vodka . Btw why did we put candy corn in it?
Threesome in a minivan. New low
I actively tried geting in the guy's pants and ended up in the girl's. I'm bad at this whole straight while drunk thing.
You. Dating a sex offender cop. Life writes itself sometimes.
He just whispered "doors are weird" and then laughed so hard he fell down the stairs.
Dude. My tinder just blew up in Seattle. I'm moving here. I don't give a fuck
Dude your life.. At your sugar daddies house sending nudes to your fwb
I was on etsy and I'm like those boobs look way too familiar
I love that you'd blow off your high school reunion to get shit faced in an aquarium with us
Um. We all know how I feel about sea life
Thanks for reminding me of all the hookups my brain has been trying to suppress...
That's what friends are foooooooor!
I think I just got suckerpunched by a 14-year-old.
GOD DAMN IT I COULD HAVE HAD A MOTHERFUCKING 3 WAY LAST NIGHT. WHY BOOZE, WHY?!
Randomize
