I just put out an orange level terrorist threat on her punani
I feel like i'm in the derek zoolander school for kids who can't read good.
$3 wine plus diet sprite does not make good champagne.
does taste better than andre tho
NEVER shave your cleavage hair.
I don't care if he acts like a don't exist 6 days a week. On the 7th day he makes makes my vagina cry. In a good way. Jesus understands.
You tried to pay the bartender in graduation checks, I think you'll be fine in the real world.
I Apparently saved a picture of the Eiffel tower in between 2 pics of his dick. It appears to be the same size. I fucking love Paris.
You demanded I give you a glass of water, so I set it down in front of you and you knock it over and roll in it..,
I wanted to be a dolphin.
He shoved his balls through an egg carton and showed us a picture. They were surprisingly egg-like.
I just threw up every bad decision and it hurts
That's how I like my men: traumatized and crying in a ball
Yeah. I asked if there was a finger in my ass at some point or if I had a weird dream. So far he hasn't responded
because of daylight savings time I lost an hour of sex with an incredibly hot guy last night. thanks a lot farmers.
I just group texted a dick pic. Wonder who'll respond back first. Ashley Stacey or my stepmom
I literally blew him under my face mask. Not because I thought it'd protect me from COVID, but because I wanted to prove to myself that I could.
Randomize
