guy in front of me on the bus did 12 yrs, hes teling me about how to knife fight
If I can't get a one-legged man to love me, what the hell chance do I have with a NORMAL guy???
How do the people at CVS not know your living in their bathroom?
You seemed more interested in the queso dip than you were in the hand job
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He completely dissapeared at the baseball game. We found him passed out at the hotel three hours later with souviner photos of himself at the top of the Sears Tower.
Its what im here for. Critiquing penis photos.
Just met me in 10 years...this lady keeps an emergency wine cooler in her bag
I said:" get your jacket, get your beer and get the fuck out of here"
Firing someone with a rhyme is the new high point in my life.
He spent $1100 at a strip club. If I had that kind of disposable income, I'd make a cocaine sandcastle.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The yoga party turned into an underwear party because we are all incompetent when it comes to tying bed sheets.
This has been a Party Success Story
Just saw a couple chasing each other on lawn mowers. Oh South Knoxville.
I don't know if your celebrity crush has ever asked you for nudes, but it's fucking awesome
I think I've been there, but who knows? I drink a lot
Not all of us can be into hot dads. Some of us have to have commitment issues and be into musicians.
its like i get a dick upgrade with every new guy i screw, at this rate i'm scared to see my next one
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