Grossest hangover story of 09: Puked in the bathtub. I was in it.
i should go to a nude beach and wear just a condom, then ill have tan lines on my dick
Just got laid for the first time in 3 yrs, 10 mo, 1 wk & 2 days. YESSSS.
Reading in my econ of energy textbook about the US' largest oil spill from the 1990's.. guess i can't sell this one back either
Take your time, they're doing body shots off the dog.
How is it possible that I am in a completely different city, and there are 2 dudes here that I've banged? How????
the amount of chicks and firearms here is unnerving. this will end awesomely or at the morgue.
Hi, my name is Ashslay and I'll be your designated shitshow.
I feel very compelled to cut off the person's ears that is sitting in front of me
I was behind him snuggling, I told him I was the big spoon and he told me I was too little it was more like he was wearing a backpack.
How bout we save the 40s for when we FINISH the project this time..
pls come tAke this super bath no romo it's just. so nice.
That's like a fucking falcon or some shit. I don't know birds but I know that is not a bird you fuck with.
Okay everything with a penis is officially dead in my eyes
Omg I should get on tinder just to get some edibles in town
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