I need help removing her.
I can feel you judging me through the phone.
There are thorn wounds on my balls, don't ever question my dedication to party again
watching hot guy on train scrolling with his blackberry's track ball... o to be that track ball...
just got high and bedazzled my bra. other than bleeding from the prongs life is so good.
It's Monday. What a great day to start the weekend on the week of st. Patricks day
He kept referring to his penis a his "love gun"
He got mauled by a 200lb cement boulder and all he could say in the back of the ambulance is 'I'm so getting laid for this'
She said I came to for a minute, shouted IHOP!! and then shook my head and said no before passing out again
Dude she broke four ribs, how does a 110 lb girl break four of my ribs during sex?! It hurts so bad but was so worth it
I remember key bumps, porn and a mom in my bed. Sums up my day.
that is an amazing summary hahaha
dude, i just accidentally flashed your mom. BIG TIME.
He came over and watched the USA game with me, fucked me so good my toe cramped, then made my bed this morning before he left. Thank God for Army rangers
I can't. I mean he's hot, but there's really nothing else there
You just said he's hot
NO YOU DON'T UNDERSTAND
Well I've decided to refuse to conform to society and be naked the rest of the day.
Randomize
