is swine flu sexually transmttd?
Ha no, why?
sriously ive never had a hangovr this bad
Want to have sex later?
This feels like a trap
The lawn was on fire, but I fixed it.
It was perfect I came I passed out in his comfortable bed then a glass of jack Daniels fell from the bed post and spilled all over my face
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm a big fan of your penis but I will not sit through an animated movie dedicated to it.
The least you could do is send me some gibberish so I know you're alive.
Fuhga
Thank you.
I like that you're Jewish, because you can rail me on Christmas Eve and it won't be weird.
Dude you filled up a protein shake mixer with White Russians so you didn't have to keep coming upstairs.
You're lucky you got out when you did, about an hour later the girl in the Franzia box started wrestling everyone.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
While leaving the bar with another guy I told the bouncer I was sad his friend had a fiancee
You were drinking Everclear weren't you?
Just to be a PITA after I die, my will leaves 1 cent to each of my FB friends. I hate my lawyer.
tell your brother to quit sending me his dick pics what am i going to do with them print them out and shove them up my ass???
On a scale of 1 to alcoholic in withdrawal how ready will you be to start drinking as soon as you arrive on campus?
It's an interesting experience to pee while a bird meows at you.
You need to get out of the house more
this is the 3rd time this week I've gone to the liquor store to stock up for the next 2 weeks
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