I'm pouring my heart out in these texts and you're going around showing everyone???
At Coney Island the sign for the rollercoaster The Cyclone says, "Make sure your glasses and weave are secure."
At least with the last gf I made it clear that I wanted to breakup when I pissed on her floor @ 3am as her roommate watched in contempt
And when I say "complete whore" I mean I could possibly make a shameful profit by wearing this.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Are you dead or are you taking another 13 hour nap? you need to let me know these things ahead of time so i dont worry.
my roommate just showed up covered in dirt, drunk....with a whole ice cream cake that says "it's a girl".
knew i was gonna lose at a shoe or be bleeding at some point. and both happened within 20 mins.
you almost dropped the shot glass then you thought you were such a hard ass for catching it that you slammed it on the table and broke it
I'm unshowered, and since I've seen this episode of say yes to the dress, I've decided to go to the store and get a frozen pizza at 10:20 am. I'm crushing life.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Omg do you remember last night you kept pointing to your vag asking who wants to play this like a fiddle hahaha
Nah I've been there. The worst you'll see is some hobo peeing in a sewer at 3 am on a Saturday
There really needs to be a redbox for wine because I want some but too lazy to walk into a store
Man i fell asleep on a random persons porch on the way home and woke up to the family banging on the windows trying to wake me up
I got a snap of someone jumping off a light pole. Was that you? Please confirm or deny. #onWisconsin
we have beer and we're watching the birds have sex in our yard.
Randomize