im at that stage where all she has to do is cough or something and it pisses me off
I'm surrounded by 3 year olds in tutus. They are far too innocent to be within at least 500 ft of me.
is there a legit reason for the weird voicemail I got at 2:14am?all I could make out was 'help me' 'two hours' and 'toilet butt'. wtf did u drink.
You just kept shouting "I AM AN ADULT!" until he agreed to carry you home on his shoulders.
It sounds like heaven mixed with world peace and orgasms. The acoustics in this car are awesome. Or it's the weed idk either way it's great
My girlfriend is studying for the MCAT by watching The Magic Schoolbus. There go my dreams of being a househusband.
Sounds good. I will just get tanked here and wear this batman mask.
my roommates tied me up with rope and duct tape then left me outside the door to the hot girls' suite on my floor, knocked on the door and ran away leaving me there with a sign that says free
Just figured out my hair is long enough to tie my wrists together. . .get over here NOW!
He doesn't want a full on relationship, he provides me with all the weed I can handle and gives me multiple mind blowing orgasms. He's my soul mate.
There's something empowering about being at dinner and sitting across the table from two men you've blown.
so hungover. idk whos house or comp im on
HANDS OFF UNTIL AFTER I DO BUTT STUFF WITH HIM.
i realized my signature handshake has now become a hookup. i love what college has done to me.
Man, I'm never going tanning again he noticed the burns on my ass
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