He told me he had never done that before...I responded with "clearly"
I thought I had fell out of his trailer but he says I tried to ninja kick his TV stand saying those girls hula hooping were trying to seduce him. There wasn't anyone else there.
Just got a script for 120 vicodin with 6 refills. I feel like michael jackson.
I could make treat bags
just saw a girl who had one of those monogrammed backpacks... her initials are VAG. is this a sign?
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They just both started mumbling "i cant go home like this" "it's all over my face" "do you have extra pants?"
Just orgasmed in canada. I should get a sticker or something that says I orgasmed in a different country.
they were having sex on the toilet apparently and everytime someone knocked they flushed. it was like an auditory scoreboard of sex duration.
i woke up this morning and saw her in my bed and i said to myself, I think I might have a drinking problem.
He put my hand on his penis and said welcome home.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The Medal of Honor you banged could be at the inauguration today. You really dropped the ball on keeping up with that one.
He expects to fuck my tits but will ignore me in public.
I just got three pairs of underwear free and a bathing suit for $20 by modeling them and letting the salesman grope me a bit.
It's great being a young gay man in Chicago!
I just wanna get high and take a fucking awesome nap. Those are my goals for the week.
I forgot her safe word. It was a rough night.
i just turned on my printer and found 10 pounds of german chocolate inside. i think i found where you hid your candy last night
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