5 years of college and never once did they teach us how to respond when you overhear a group of 7th grade boys who are in your class talking about how you're definitely DTF
children are so perceptive these days... and horny
I woke up this morning really drunk with my Christmas lights on and two owls in my bed.
It's not weird mascara. I just have puke crusted on my eyelashes.
The pride tent is doing free lube tastings. There is also a mechanical bull.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Could be my worst decision since the whole 'third degree burn' fiasco.
i feel like this needs to be a 'lose some teeth' kind of weekend.
tried doing a cartwheel after 10 beers. Guess who has a dislocated shoulder.
Fuck going to see The Hunger Games tonight. The only thing I'm hungry for is some dick. Let's go to the bar.
I got a 5 dollar bill, 1 condom, and no alcohol. I get payed on Thursday. Let's do this shit.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
who orders an old fashioned in 2014? even my Grandparents think you're an asshole.
there are not enough nopes in the world for that situation.
do you remember yelling out "insecurity makes my pussy dry!" unnecessarily loud at the bar?
He propositioned me for a threesome once so yeah I'd say he has what it takes to run for public office
I tied him up for his boyfriend so he could get fisted... I'm the best roommate ever.
Wow. That's certainly more than I've ever done for a roommate.
I'm trying to imagine how upset he was when he realized that he had been cockblocked by a picture of a sloth and I am drawing indescribable pleasure from it.
Randomize