are we going to glenview for practice??
(3 hrs later) aids
where r u? what is story? im way too high right now
had no condoms so I just made do with an empty doritos bag.
But you know it's love when you find brass knuckles in the same box he keeps his Naruto action figures.
Drunk man just did a hand stand, fell over, knocked over a whole table of desserts, and didnt lose his cowboy hat. winner.
Would it help you get over me if I told you that I had unprotected sex last night?
just shottied a beer can with a pumpkin carver. i love October.
What do you think it is?
It's a boy. I know it. She always manages to have a cock inside her somehow.
My only regret is that I have but one penis to give to your vagina.
Clearly my hormones are sending beaming lights to every penis in the area
I cried singing "call me maybe" on the way home from the bar. What the fuck
If I get to the point of singing Man of Constant Sorrow then please god let me do it, record it, then cut me off.
If you can get her to make out with you without paying for it, I will personally make you president of the american lesbian league
He's like a computer from 2001 in a 2014 world. It just doesn't work. Lots of glitches.
He sent me a picture of his cock that seemed to indicate that we were still on good terms.
At some point you said you just wanted to get laid, so we had a moment of silence for your dead sex life...
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