We should go out drinking together soon
I'm still not going to have sex with you
Wearing the BK Crown on the throne while dropping the kids off at the pool? Yes, one of my life's goals. Win
Kinda felt bad though cuz she whimpered and shuttered a lot, i felt like i was kicking a puppy, only the puppy liked it and came a bunch
the worst part is we had a camera rolling
Did his mom notice it when she saw u guys?
Yes.
I have to watch that.
Two dudes got up on top of the pianos and danced shirtless. They didnt even get kicked out. I love vegas
I love you, but you should know I'll always ditch you for weed.
You can't break up with me and ask me for a handjob on the same day. At least not in that order.
It looks like sephora exploded on his dick, so i assumed I was the second girl that gave him head that night.
It's only slutty if you don't have his number. Unless there's a full moon. Then anything goes.
I'm gonna play this game called Conquer the Dicks. I think it is self explanatory.
if a CSI technician examined our hotel room with a black light he'd think we hit the Pulse button a DNA blender without a lid
I'm gonna guess ur still high cus last night at like 3am my pillows were morphing into cats and I kept trying to pet them
The 666th photo in my phone is of him and if that's not a sign that he's secretly the Antichrist, idk what is. Also, bring more rum.
Can't meet up at the party. Gary was caught by the cops attempting to drop a deuce thru his ex wife's Subaru via sun roof. Details as soon as bail is processed.
My parents left me the house for the weekend...you know what that means?!
Harry Potter marathon and no pants.
Randomize
