Kiss
Puke
so then you didnt wanna fuck tonight right?
oops, you werent supposed to get that until you left.
My drunk dialing habit needs to go. My drunk habit can stay though.
Wtf. Who made this Big Mac, Helen Keller?
Her little brother was home, so we had to hook up while playing hide and seek with him
Just got the test results back. All clean, Now whose an idiot for going bareback in South America for 3 months straight.
Due to our sore throats we are now doing bong hits with cranberry juice to sooth it.
just remembered spooning on the cardboard and confessing to each other we had the spins.
Well I'm going to San Francisco next weekend for pride. I'm sure I'll end up drunk and on a beach at some point.
what i'd really like is a nice helping of naked boyfriend with a side of naked boyfriend.
my confident boosted when he told me that it was I who started making out with him. ME. NOT HIM.
I AM SHOCKED AND PROUD OF MYSELF
We just had sex on an abandoned logging road while wearing snow shoes. God bless Montana boys.
Sometimes I look at her and just start choking. She is that much of an evil entity.
It's 8 in the morning and you're doing coke and drinking margaritas. First, you have a problem. Second, why didn't you invite me?
Dad is wasting no time getting back out there. Just walked in on him and a Twin Peaks waitress in the hot tub
Randomize
