So i decided to deal with the awkwardness of last night by making out with all three of them
Omg just want to confirm: got drunk, naked in street, fucked in bathroom and puked on bart.
i think i just heard my dad finish in the other room...
I have never pre-planed for a better sober morning than lacing my muffin batch with tylenol.
corn on the cob and anal lube are not substitutes for the real thing
THE BIG GAY MAD HATTER IS HERE AND HE HAS DRUGS IN HIS PANTS FOR YOU. COME DOWNSTAIRS BITCHEZZZZ
I'm staying in tonight, it's my Christmas present to my liver.
He just invited me over to bang on a sunday afternoon. If I can make it top the time I went to a strip club on fathers day then I'll consider it a success.
she was trying to use her iTranslate app while we were having sex.
And I can feel feelings now and they hurt
When he pulls out of you and farts and says ahh I wanted to do that for the past 30 mins ....you rethink the next drunken hook up
People around me are just doing lines of cocaine. Like its no big deal. And I'm just here like.... Y'all want some cheezits?
U have successfully fucked my brains out. I just almost put deodorant on like chapstick
I'll be the Broncos and you be the Seahawks and you can pound the shit out of me.
Well, I have no idea where my underwear is, so yea I would say it was a good weekend.
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