There's a vagina buried somewhere in there.
Ok a condom literally fell out of my underwear this morning, i have never been so confused.
Also, I once came to the conclusion after this one boy, that her pleasure condoms are a college boys version of flowers
I should have some sort of frequent buyer card or something. I just bought my third bottle of Captain this week. It's Wednesday.
That's why you NEVER put anything a stripper gave you in your mouth
My younger brother just got high fives from all my guy cousins for fucking my best friend. I hate family gatherings.
HOLY FUCK I JUST GOT WOKEN UP BY THUNDER!!!!!
I THINK I SHARTED
Remind me to call McDonald's to give a good review of Ruth. She truly demonstrated grace under pressure.
Noo.... Like in the attic of a crack house with nitrous and fat chicks weird....
Dude, where are you?
In back
of car
... whose car?
Like I just asked Greg why I don't have a crown for my vagina. That drunk.
Can we talk about the fact that a stranger is doing a line of coke off our living room table right now?
You would think a husband, a boyfriend, and a vibrator would be enough. But sadly it's not
He told me that he wants to fuck me only wearing a princess tiara...How could I possibly say no to that?
We just finished having sex and as soon as we get out of bed he yells "trust fall" and runs me over
Randomize
