We started making out, then he decided to get naked, put on a condom, and proceed to dry hump my leg, sweat pants and all, until he blew his load. I thought this was college. I immediatly left claiming I can't sleep in other people's rooms. He didn't even bother taking off my hoodie.
Life is so much better after having sex.
dude sorry but u no that when a guys 'likes' ur pic on facebook it only means he was just jacking off to it.
there's chicken and sequins in our bathroom sink. part of me almost wants to know what happened
i was surprised by the severity of his small dick condition
You know why I moved here? No public intoxication law. A cop just helped me from my bent over vomit pose, asked if I was ok, and gave me a ride home.
I wanna throw up and cum in that order
well I think it'll pretty much be gone by Saturday. On a scale of 1- Snooki's unborn child how much do periods freak you out?
I'm so stoned I just sat here for like at least 45 min thinking about how I would get some jack in the box tacos if only I knew where my wallet was and then I kind of blinked and finally noticed I had literally been staring at my wallet the ENTIRE fucking time
why does drunk me think that doing things like throwing up on my desk and all over my 15 page lab report is okay
Ps he swallowed my earring last night so yeah
I even put my vibrators back in the bedroom instead of the coffee table. If that's not growing up then I don't know what is.
Hey can you send me a pic of your breast with a peace sign in the photo? I'm trying to win a scavenger hunt contest. Thanks so much
If we're going to communicate going forward, you'll need to be versed in Gillian Anderson.
Omg I joined a choir last night...
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