I'm sorry I'm just not ready to become vampire yet
what ever happened to devon sawa?
fuck...who knows?
i'm really worried about him.
to do: lose virginity to hamster dance
Is it bad that Pitbull has taught me more Spanish than high school did?
HOLY SHIT! Did you see the dick on that Great White Shark?!?!?!
The hardest part of getting a new computer is deliberating whether to start the cycle of porn and viruses all over again.
After we smoked, the cops questioned us but i just asked if he wanted to join our basketball team.
thank god we only have to drink eggnog and rum once a year. It taste like shit.
They made out. Sounded like hippos drinking water
I think that's the key to being an adult though... Get those rapid fire beer shits out I the way early, then you can go about your grown man business
Having to grow a landing strip to cover the bruises from pole dancing. Thanks for the birthday present, but next time, maybe just a gift card?
I feel like our relationship should have moved on from you constantly asking if I'm gay
You told me that you were mad me because I wouldn't let you 'explore my castle'. Then you said I smelled like a hospital and passed out.
I love how we can bond over the fact that we're the only ones who think the guy I drunk hooked up with looks like Voldemort
imagine the bill from school house rock beating the shit outta you
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