She told me she got a 15 on her A.C.T.. that's when I knew it was a done deal.
the line runs infront of fredricks of hollywood. it's like gamestop is showing me how pathetic I am.
I got a 69.7 in accounting. I have this whole doing the bare minimum down to a science
ohhh no, absolutely not. i am waaayyy too superstitious to have sex with the self-proclaimed "baby-maker" on father's day...
He just climbed off me and used my hairspray to fix his hair. If he hadn't just gone down on me I would think he's gay.
Status Uddate: I lost half a tooth and Alison is taking Amy Grant requests via bullhorn
So my dad just walked in on me with the same girl twice in 3 nights. I told him if he wants to see her tits to adleast admit it. All he did was smirk.
Yo, go checkout Kerri's Instagram quick! There's like 12 pics of her fucking some guy in a bar's bathroom. GO GO GO GO!!!!
I also made him write a nonfiction romance novel about what happened and to give it to me when the time was right
Well I passed out before 4:20 on 4/20 so I deem it a failure AND a success.
My coworker's brand new computer showed up today. He's on vacation for the next week. Brian and I are installing Windows 98 on it.
WHAT IS WRONG WITH YOU
MANY MANY THINGS AND MOST OF THEM ARE YOUR FUCKING FAULT
Just laying in bed, snuggling my cat, and pondering whether I'd like to attend a swingers party this evening...
His mom wants to come see the dorm.
Hide the whip.
You now have a new job. Call me around 1pm everyday and make sure I've eaten something. All I've had today is dick and cheesecake.
Randomize
