as for my dating sex life, no more regret sticks. Only pride wands from now on.
Making out with married ex girlfriends: priceless
you had a panic attack, pissed yourself, and started crying. you never go above the kiddie level of my lil bros schools haunted house ever again.
round 2?
EVER.
believe me... letting the man that delivered you from your mother's vagina do shots off your stomach is really fucking awkward.
i don't want a singing card. it disturbs my hangover. give me a pack of cigs taped to a bottle of wine and fuck me without a condom. happy vday baby.
The only ground rules are no one is allowed to come who will say "no, that's a bad idea" or "what if we get arrested?"
My neighbor just watched me eat a granola bar without pants, this is a whole new level of unemployed
yeah people on the adjacent balcony, Im naked drinking outside in 0 degree weather at 1pm. got a problem?
You threw up? Were you ladylike while you did it? I'm wagering that you were. Like a Disney princess. Like a "Puke Me Pretty" Barbie.
I'm drunk in your building find me and we can have sex.
Yo, go checkout Kerri's Instagram quick! There's like 12 pics of her fucking some guy in a bar's bathroom. GO GO GO GO!!!!
There are two guys's cum on my sheets. Be a man and be the third.
Like 50% of me thinks it'll be weird, 25% of me is curious & 25% of me is horny
I'm not talking about Donald Trump in the midst of sending you nudes
Im playing a game I have to take a drink every time my gram asks me the same question hammered by 4 guaranteed...
Randomize
