TXT her NOW! The phone is actually IN her Va-Jay-Jay!!
Why are handjobs necessary in class?
I just did the scooter of shame. New levels of embarrassment have now opened.
It was as if you forgot how to speak normally. All of your words came out either backwards or in song form
You kept hugging the big bouncer & feeling the other ones beard
I don't remember what happened but judging from the contents of my pockets it had something to do with potatoes and glo in the dark condoms
But I feel like studying my flashcards during a blowjob would be rude...
He's acting like I should like him more than vodka and Taco Bell, but I just don't ser that happening.
I woke up to a full mcdonalds meal being shoved in my face. Mom mustve noticed the empty tequila bottle. I love family.
this is the first time in over a year I had a pregnancy scare and actually would have known who the father was. I guess this is what adulthood feels like.
You know just a typical night. Eating peanut butter off of tablespoons and having sex to our favorite Christmas carols. This is my favorite time of year.
Definitely thought about throwing up in the cat box since it's not as far to the bathroom..
Stay positive! You think people like sad vaginas? NO! You'll get some!
Banging to Billy Joel pandora is like russian roulette. But I made him cum to Let It Be so I we both walked away victors
can you tell me why i woke up in a diaper and combat boots?
Randomize
