Midnight walks are trippy
I tried to do that earlier, but I was alone and scared, so I stole a happy Birthday balloon.
if i hurry i can finally have sex while stoned off my ass
godspeed.
you were convinced that if all her tampons were gone her period would stop, so you started eating them.
dude they were twins that means they were both only 17
I just opened up the mens room door to a dude pissing in the urinal and pointing at himself in the mirror
she's throwing a head of lettuce everywhere shouting HEADS UP and trying to get us to play catch with her. i'm scared.
He's blaming gravity for his problems right now, so put that in perspective
PSA: Morning booty calls are no longer accepted after the hours of 6am when I've been drinking or before 11am when I have not. Your cooperation is appreciated.
Dude this deaf chick is totally hot, I just bought an apartment on boner ave
It was a group decision to take your pants off. Took a solid 10 minutes. No more skinny jeans while drinking.
It'd probably just be a lot of profanity and hyperventilation and deteriorating into tears anyways
so just a regular conversation then
It started with a wedding, followed by a drag show, and ended with Trevor getting punched in the face by the bouncer. How was your weekend?
So... In conclusion, do I bring my vibrator and risk not only having it getting taken out at security, but also exposing my dad to my neon green vibrator, or just leave it here?
Let's just say it was like a porno version of Aladdin....
Just come here quick. I'm home in 3min. It will take you literally less than 5 to walk. Then 2 to undress, 16 to fuck, 2 to dress again and 5 to walk back..!!
exactly 16 eh??
Randomize
