i'm eating jello out of a teacup with a fork. awesome?
sometimes i wish i had a whole other life to spend on youtube
That adds atleast one bjs worth of awkward sexual tension between us.
Her "get-your-paper-done-early-blowjob" incentive is the thing that has successfully deterred my procrastination
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
brittany murphy hurts far more than michael jackson, patrick swayze, etc because i never masturbated to any of those other people
he was sobbing,drinking his beer, all while confessing his love for her. awkward was an understatement...
protesters in toronto definately have the best pot
no. 1 rule of bromania: no females
I don't care how drunk you were. Sending me a pic of your dick dressed as Uncle Sam with the caption "I want you" isn't an acceptable pick up line.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He wants to take me instead of his girlfriend to the happiest place on earth... By that He meant Vegas. My morals are just loose enough to think this is a good idea
I'm like an air traffic controller of women. It's a very similar job. Well spaced and gentle landings are good. When they meet, it's bad. Explosions bad. Dying screaming burning children bad.
I was on the verge of being completely over him and then he went and made his Instagram not private... ITS LIKE HE KNEW
YAY! I just removed my own stitches, and I'm only bleeding from one spot! on a related note, do you think a dishwasher will sterilize forceps and trauma shears?
11:30 you texted me saying he was on his way. 11:37 you said, "Oh my God that was terrible."
Look, I am sorry I shaved your cat...but get over it.
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