There's a girl sitting in front of me making a PowerPoint on Jack Bauer.
Yo, if someone calls you asking for John Stamos, just go with it.
My penis hasn't been this frustrated since I was like 13 and I awkwardly got boners at school dances
Also, I just saw a woman change into her stripper outfit in the bathroom at Target.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i just remembered the time you guys tried to give me an intervention because i was drunk before 5 on a monday
just wrote a 6 page paper on my blackberry. including 3 sources. college is teaching me good things so far.
Well he has that kind of carefree attitude that comes from a big penis
You know its good night when theres makeup smears on the toilet seat
Please tell me how I go from a guy with a coke problem to a cop. My own life doesn't even make sense to me anymore
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Food poisoning on first date... Still rode the mechanical bull like a champ
He's a fucking asshole. Who gives good head. And seriously I have never seen someone less committed to hair color
How do I say "I still wanna hook up w you but I don't wanna see your penis via text ever again" through a snapchat
She looks like a beluga.
I want to splash her with water and when she screams say "I didn't want you to die. You looked parched"
He danced with some other girls and you started yelling "I can't believe I wasted half my Chili's gift card on you" at him
I have tasted many bathrooms
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