No, don't ignore my call, i just need to know, whats cuter a pig in boots or a miniature horse sitting down..
We need to have an Itty-Bitty Titty Committee mtg somewhere in the range of 5 minutes to ASAP.
Also, we should really buy some bandaids. Right now I'm using toilet paper and scotch tape, but I don't really think that's sanitary.
He's crying and calling me out on using him. It's awful. And I'm too drunk to leave.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
even the AIR tastes like tequila.
The doctor told me if I woke up with a broken foot and don't know how it happened, I might want to look into getting treatment.
I took 36 pictures of my lava lamp. your weed wins.
You paid at the door and they gave you a straw for the kiddie pool full of booze.
After a bit there were two girls who got naked and liquor wrestled. I don't think it was planned.
As a heterosexual male nursing student, the odds are ever in my favor. My first semester has basically been The Horny Games. I've killed almost all of the competitors at this point.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
somehow a ride to walgreens turned into a threesome.
I was just tongue fucked into oblivion.
So I was laying on the couch reading a book and he texted me. All I saw was the image of him spitting on my vagina last night in the moonlight. I gagged.
we should get together and get drunk.
On a Monday?
don't discriminate against mondays.
No instead we fucked in the elevator.. it was wrong on so many levels..
How tall was the building? Maybe it was only wrong on some of them
my favorite sex position is the one where no sex actually happens we just get really stoned and eat a lot and watch netflix in the dark
Randomize