I may or may not be laying in bed naked watching The Nanny. Niles is so spunky.
we'll penetrate his innocence with our dicks
Just told the nurse I wouldn't get on the scale. Told her to write FAT.
she quoted hannah montana in her facebook status. i will never be speaking to her in person again.
I feel like I've been slapped by Gods icy cold dick of vengeance.
Dangr zzzzzzzzone
My goal for break? Fuck all my exes in reverse order.
omg I just had an epiphany about why I grew into such a whore....
HAVE YOU EVER NOTICED WHAT THE SPICE GIRLS USED TO WEAR?!? those were my idols, I never stood a chance
it's taken me 3 hours to eat this pudding cup. I think I am melting.
I want your cock.
All we are is dust in the wiiiiiiinnnnnnnnnnd
yeah...well...life isn't all puppies & lap dances
Apparently she "missed me" and the only logical solution was to fuck my brother.
Uess honpr I rememebrt hEzS cuter
You'll have to translate that into sober in the morning.
Dude. So. Much. Sex. Find a girl in her 30s. Now.
Can you please come in my room and pour water in my mouth? Too hungover to move. btw who is this guy in my bed? Can't see his face. Cute?
Randomize
