Dogs love guiness but it fucks up their kidneys
Dude WTF? His teammate just started talkin to me on fb! Am I walking around with a "I like to f**k gators" on my forehead?
No, it just says ur easy
I almost took home a boy from the bar last night, till i realized he was not speaking drunk, he was from another country and didnt know english. that could have been an awkward morning.
dollar beers will do that to you.
he got instantly turned off in the middle of a blowjob when he heard the news "twilight beat the blockbuster record of batman"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
they almost convinced me to put "Funbags" in the 'other names you may be known as' section of the job application
We left at the same time. You got home three hours after I did and said you got your head stuck in a fence. I can't believe you don't remember this.
How could you give up sex for lent? I gave up religion for lent years ago and never looked back. Or give up civility, not sex.
Don't underestimate her when she starts going by "the vodka queen"
At orientation, some girl is asking, loudly, where she can get weed. Everyone looks discussed but are paying very close attention to people's answers.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
it's taken me 3 hours to eat this pudding cup. I think I am melting.
If you're mature enough to fuck him you're mature enough to tell him you don't want a relationship come on
I heard them banging and it sounded like he was trying to stuff a fucking coconut into her
Went home w the NY Islander in a NY Rangers jersey, needless to say he was pissed
WE'RE NOT MAKING A DICK PIZZA OKAY
While he was at a job interview yesterday, I was dropping acid. So that's the aesthetic of our relationship rn.
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