I just put anything in between my legs and hope for the best.
I gave him a blowie and after he said he wanted to send a giftbasket to the girl we met through.
He told me his condom was going to expire tomorrow and he needed to use it. I can't believe I fell for it.
My #1 goal this summer is to get drunk at olive garden
Guess who just hooked up with the cop that fingerprinted her?
Handle of 100 proof captain dressed like a pilgrim here we go
They evidently had to pull his penis out of me while we were passed out on the floor.
I'll be there soon. I expect Advil and a bucket of kittens when I arrive.
Day 1 of "Death of a Liver" weekend complete. It came with flashbacks of horrible mistakes I made due to alcohol. I'm excited for how Sunday is going to turn out.
Well his ex just grabbed his dick and told him yep Ill call u later
I bought a vibrating wall dildo with my tax return. You?
A man can only lie in bed watching COPS for so long before he wants to do things that can lead him to starring on the show.
I went to watch porn and there's already 3 Santa videos. Happy November 1st.
Yeah last night got weird fast. No lie, a kid pulled a butt-plug with a tail out of his ass.
I told him to take his man panties off and take the fucking Jaeger bomb already, so no to a 2nd date
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