i'm going to be honest, my vagina smells.
There is NOTHING better than watching a child being chased by an ostrich.
He spanked me with a plate. I'm not sure where this is going...
I am moving slowly w him. I havent even masturbated to him yet.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
what part of what i said meant "bring a bowl"
"bouncy castle"
come back what if one of your parents walks in and im just sitting here eating a cheesesteak without you
I am in macy's and just straight up heard an old lady taking a crap in her depends.
Don't worry, I could have been accepted their by waving my dick at the admissions building.
why do all the dudes in this porno look like billy ray cyrus
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
why does CNN give a flying $@*# about the royal baby so, so much?
i hope they name him Joffrey
I'm so proud of us for not dying.
If I make it home without being sick in this captain's hat it will be a fucking miracle.
he's the only real guy friend I've had who I've never made out with
Everything isn’t always sunshine & rainbows. Sometimes there’s tequila.
Ugh hungover at a laundromat is a terrible feeling. For some reason I keep getting sucked into staring at the clothes spinning around and around and it makes me want to profusely projectile vomit everywhere
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