But honestly u used to be a cool guy and lately uve been superame(734): Superlame
I dont get it-she has sex with me but wont be my facebook friend?
You took my girl thats shot the Fuck out. You better watch your skinny ass.
That's barely a sentence. Who's your girl? I think you've got the wrong number. I haven't even lived in Alabama for 4 years.
Yeah, I do, I'm sorry. I meant 205 not 256. sorry about that.
Good luck with your revenge in Birmingham.
I peed while puking? Even better
Yes you most deff did. Ultimate multi tasker you are
If you're ever in Seattle we should Fuck. Or get coffee, whatever.
That's the great thing about NY, if you pee your dress you have an entire cab ride to air dry your panties before the next club.
you went around grabbing cigarettes out of peoples mouths and claiming you were curing cancer.
I'm doing the Macarena naked in my living room right now
I see you're taking unemployment seriously.
I wish I could just hang out in ERs.
Hey guy that stepped on my foot, don't slap my ass to apologize.
Whoa, I am aware of WAY too many squirrels right now...
This chick at the gym, just informed me I was super funny this weekend. Especially when I untied her friends bikini top after throwing up in the women's restroom. SWEET black out chronicles has another story
apparently when a guy says "if there's anything missing in your life, I will provide" he's not expecting attractive lesbians to be the answer.
He told me he wished he could shrink down to a small size so he could live inside my cleavage
he probably thinks i inited him over to have sex but really i just want to show him 90's music videos
Randomize
