Dude if you're in another zip code it doesn't count
You don't understand. I'm not like you.
bras are like tupperware for tits, keeps em fresh.
Just gave my little brother the collection of clothes that boys have left in my room since I've been in college for his birthday.
how do i tell her that i need alcohol to fuck her but at the same time i cant get a hard on with alcohol.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just credit carded her and her mom at the same time... that drunk. get on my level
Just suggested things for my dad to get my mom for Christmas in terms of "yeah you'll get laid."
if your not going to answer your phone this is just going to be an embarrassment tomorrow
You are literally throwing a tangerine right now. Beer pong is not played this way
Is there really anything more beautiful than opening a fresh box of wine on a Friday afternoon?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I want to get business cards and hand them to hot guys and say " hey if you ever want to like makeout and pretend it never happened call me"
Also, I'm going to yoga because I have a Taylor Swift range of emotions right now.
NATIONAL GIVE A BOSTON COP A BLOW JOB BITCH ROAD TRIP NOW
It's 11:13am and my chem prof is drinking a beer in class. I guess finals week is stressful for them too
I woke up this morning with a tampon in my nose and food EVERYWHERE...
Remember when we used to smoke out of an apple at the playground? Those were some precious moments
I had sex in the tube at that same playground once. That park is full of memories.
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